Quiet time….what is it supposed to look like?
Ok, so I know right off the bat that this topic may be a bit controversial and that we all may have different opinions. This could be based on many different things such as our preferences, the way we have been taught to believe, personal conviction, etc. I am writing this blog from my own experience. I have been contemplating a lot lately about the idea of quiet time. I have followed Jesus wholeheartedly since I was 14 years old, and I have been brought up with the understanding that quiet time is a vital part of ones Christian walk. While I still believe this is very true, I have been deeply pondering how this is supposed to be walked out in our daily lives. As a momma of three girls, my quiet times have “ebbed and flowed” over the years, and let’s admit, right now my quiet times looks dramatically different than my season prior to being a mommy.
Before having children I took for granted the abundance of time I had to tuck away with God. I didn’t realize the importance of it until that time was no longer readily at my fingertips. What I didn’t understand so much in those younger years is that my faith is not just about “routine.” As a young Christian and having a propensity towards perfectionism (which you may be aware of if you’ve read my previous posts) I would more often look to “checking this time off” as part of a well-planned “to-do list” I had for my day. It didn’t make these times less meaningful to me, on the contrary it helped me form a firm foundation for my times with God each day. So, I am not about to knock having a “plan” in place for your time with God. What I’ve struggled with after having kids was that my daily routine went totally out of the window! I no longer felt in control of my own time.
The lack of routine I was experiencing in life now flowed into my quiet time with God. I struggled to wake up early from the sleep deprivation I was experiencing. I am not a night person at all and when I would try to force myself to spend those precious moments with God after the kiddos fell asleep, I would rush through it yearning for bedtime. I STRUGGLED! I know many of you more seasoned mommas out there are internally giving me advice about how it will get better, that one day I will get the quiet time back I once had. And yes, I know this is true. This is where my pondering has come from. Is “quiet time” about dutifully coming before God and running through a prayer checklist or is it more about relationship?
If we looked at this time as more of a relationship, like we have with our husband or a best friend, I believe we would begin to do life differently. Yes, we need to be intentional no doubt. I don’t go without planning special moments with my loved ones to build deeper intimacy and closeness, but I also carry them in my mind and heart, even in my daily tasks when I’m not even present with them. What am I saying? When it comes to quiet time, in the season of life when those “scheduled” times are harder and you can’t catch a break….I have begun to just walk each day in relationship with my Savior. In specific, I’ve “personified” my quiet time. Romans 8:9 says, “the Spirit of God dwells in us.” We are walking every moment of our day with God alive inside of us, readily available for a conversation when needed.” In this season of my life, I’ve begun to be more aware of God’s presence even in the moments you wouldn’t expect. In washing the dishes, driving home from the grocery store, and even harder moments of discipline or correction with my kids. I am realizing that HE IS THERE…RIGHT THERE and I only need to acknowledge Him and invite Him into every moment. This has truly changed me. I know one day I will have those deep, intentional, hour-long quiet times back and they will be so sweet… Until then, I am intentionally inviting Him to be with me, in every moment of my day. Inviting Him to speak even in the loudness, to nudge my heart when I need to be reminded that I’m not alone, and to allow him to always be present with me no matter what.
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